FB - Seme

Title: FB – seme (aka Vanity and Sex)
Author: Enide Dear
Pairing: Valenwind, Renaj, Lozoo
Rating: cute, slightly kinky ending
Summary: The relationships from the seme’s point of view…




“Ain’t you done yet, Loz?” Reno whined in utter boredom. “What’s taking so fucking long, yo?”

“I need to get a present for Yazzie.” Loz ignored the Turk, walking down the street with long steps . “I didn’t say you had to come along. I didn’t even say you *could* come along!”

“Yeah, well, Tseng and Rufus insist someone keeps an eye on you Remnants when you’re in Midgard,” grumbling Reno hurried to keep up. “I didn’t have much choice when you agreed to come along and help Cid get those whatsit parts for the engine. Why couldn’t you just have gone with him to 7:th Heaven instead of running around out here?! We could have gotten a beer or three by now!”

“Weren’t you supposed to be our designated driver?” Loz peered into a shop window, frowned, sighed, and kept walking. “Anyway, Tifa doesn’t like me at the bar, and since I got Kitty presents I have to get one for Yazoo or he’ll be jealous of her. I mean, more jealous than he already is.”

“I drive better if I’m a bit drunk anyway.” Reno pouted. “And Yazoo needs therapy if he’s jealous at a cat! What did you get her?”

“A new, plush velvet bed pillow, extra strong cat nip, three of those little squeaky toys she likes to bite to pieces so much…”

“Screw Yazoo – you need therapy!” Reno groaned. “So what are you getting for Yazoo?”

“I don’t know. Um. Something nice. Something pretty. What do you get Kadaj when you’ve been away?”

“A good hard screw.” Reno grinned. “Works every time!”

“I really didn’t need to know that.” Loz muttered.

“How about chocolate? That’s classic.”

“He claims it makes him fat – don’t look at me like that, I know it’s not true, but…” Loz shrugged.

“Flowers? Alright, bad idea…” Reno wracked his head for romantic things. It wasn’t a line of thought he often pursued. “Jewelry?”

“Get stuck when fighting.”

“A dead zolom? A cut off head? A dead cat in a box? I don’t fucking know! You guys are too strange!”

“Then just shut up and leave me alone! It’s not as if I asked your opinion anyway!”

“Look, I’m just trying to help, right? I want to go back to Kadaj, not hang around in Midgard with you and no beer.” Turning down the EMR to its lowest, Reno used it to help dispersing a couple of people blocking the sidewalk. “What *does* Yazoo like?”

“Um, me, his own looks, sex…”

“Yeah, he’s Kadaj’s brother alright….” Something buzzed in Reno’s pocked and he drew up his phone. “Cid? Yeah, we’re not even close to done here, sorry. Hey, did you get anything for Vince? Polish for guns and bullets? Yeah, you’re the very pinnacle or romance, Highwind…what’ you mean it depends on the kind of gun and bullets?”

“Never mind, I found it!” Loz hurried across the street, his eyes fixed on a shop. “This is perfect!”

“That? Are you sure? Well, I ain’t arguing if it means we can finally go back.” Reno sighed as Loz went inside to buy the gift. “Seems we’re done here after all, Highwind, but you’d better come pick us up. Loz bought something…big.”


“I love it.” Yazoo’s voice was filled with wicked delight as he and Loz came downstairs, looking slightly dishelved and very happy. “It combines all my favorite things!”

“Mmmm….” Loz mumbled and smiled. “I knew you’d like it.”

“What did he get him?” Kadaj asked Reno as his brothers walked out. “C’mon, I want to see!”

He pulled Reno with him and hurried upstairs to their rooms, but looked around, frowning.

“You said it was big. And I saw Lloz carrying something huge and flat upstairs, wrapped in paper. But I can’t see anything new here.”

Reno grinned, trying hard not to laugh.

“You ain’t looking in the right place, Kaddy.” He sniggered and pointed to the roof above the bed.

Kadaj’s eyes got huge.

“I’m pretty sure there wasn’t a mirror over the bed before….” He turned to Reno and smiled wickedly. “So how about giving me my present now, hm?”

“How do you know what I was gonna give you?” Reno grinned back and locked the door, moving in on Kadaj to push the purring Sephling down on the bed where he could see himself as Reno started to kiss his way down the deceptively slender neck.

“Because,” Kadaj panted a bit, “you always give me the same thing. And I always love it.”